i hate the fact that i miss kaloy. i hate the fact that he's always there at the back of my mind. i hate everything my friends say about him and that they taunt my views on relationships. i hate the fact that i actually care about a person who doesn't seem to acknowledge my existence. i hate the fact that you cannot depend on anybody. for anything. that promises were made to be broken. and if you believe in other people's promises it will just break your heart. i hate that i'm being weak about this and emotionally parasitic on friends.

Lord, why? Why are all these feelings here? And how did they actually grow without me even seeing him? Please take them away if they are not Your will.

And I hate the fact that for the umpteenth time in my life, I'm doing nothing.